If there’s one thing we’ve learned from our Arctic adventures, it’s that human stubbornness knows no latitude. Where most creatures call it quits, slap on some fur, and hibernate, humans build bars, churches, and—of course — saunas. Because what’s a little darkness, ice, and bone-snapping wind when there’s beer to drink, sins to confess, and steam to sweat out?

We’ve been there, frozen that — from sipping local brews in Svalbard to sweating it out in a sauna shaped like a golden egg in Sweden. So here’s our firsthand guide to the northernmost everythings—places so absurdly remote that you’ll question why (and how) they even exist.